Adventures in School Programs

So Big Stink had a program tonight through his school. The entire school was doing a thing on the history of America, and Big Stink's class got to do the history of Colorado.
Approximately 350 kids, with at least 1 parent (most with 2) along with a grandparent or aunt/uncle or two, almost all crammed into a theater that was designed in the '60s and was rated for approximately 256 people.
If anyone is familiar with Grand Junction, the program was being held at the Central High School auditorium.Yeek....
Anyways, we're piling into the auditorium, and all these people are sitting on the sides of the auditorium, at the front of the row. There are like, six or seven seats, and these idiots are sitting in the very first two seats, with five empty ones on the other sides of them. Then, quite a few of them had the audacity to complain about parents who kept getting up to help their kids or babies out.
So the program starts - Kids are cute, the songs are catchy, and stink, little stink and various younger cousins start getting their monkey on.
Squirming, whining, shrieking... and that was just little stink.
So finally, Big Stinks, part of the program comes up, and it is great. Big Stink has some great parts ( he played a Cavalry soldier who bosses other characters around). Every time Big Stink was in the spotlight and said something, Stink would laugh and say "Stink Funny!" (not what he really said, but I'm substituting Big Stink's nickname for his real name).
After that, the older kids had their part (which too forever!) but was still cool. Then parts of our group decided to storm out ((for what reason goddess may only know) at least that's what it seemed like to me). So as were getting ready to leave, the other mom in our carpool walks by and says "well at least he (Big Stink) can really project up there".
It's probably good I didn't have any utensils or pointed objects right then because I really wanted to shove it in her eye. It's not like her kid is any better - damn psychotic little shit.
Regardless, we decided to get the gang together and get ice cream at the local National chain of ice cream vendor.
Long story short, Little stink barfed in the store, Lovely Wife played trooper, took little stink outside while our crew inside helped clean up, and then we went home for the night.

Fun huh?

(P.s. Minor Grammar issue really f'ed up the story. Thanks to Paidon <@Paidon> for pointing out it's Cavalry, not Calvary. That's kinda like the difference between a solider and the place where Christ died. Having issues with that last phrase... started out as ...the place where death dies... then became the place where death died, then slowly morphed into ...the place where Chirst dies. Thank god I'm a discordian.)